Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize