So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
