I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
