It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
