OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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