Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
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By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
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The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
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