This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I know her cup size but not her name....
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
