ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I can't turn off my feet"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
