Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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