Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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