So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
