Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
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