For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
