The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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