What did we do last night that was yellow?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
