have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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