You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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