I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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