Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize