He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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