'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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