youre lurking in front of me
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
