I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
