it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.