I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
