Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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