Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
i think i just naturally attract stoners
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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