you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize