piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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