I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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