i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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