Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
