My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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