the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
