Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
