My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I am available for nakedness
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize