He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
