Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk