pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I have tasted many bathrooms
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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