this boner is exhausting
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
