Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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