Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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