Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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