I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize
