she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Your topless pictures make me question reality
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
