community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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