This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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