She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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