their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
