Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
he high fived his dick after we had sex
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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