carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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