therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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